Joke for today!

[SAR900]

Two prawns were swimming around in the sea

One called Justin and the other called Kristian.

The prawns were constantly being harassed and threatened by sharks that inhabited the area.

Finally one day Justin said to Kristian, 'I'm fed up with being a prawn;

I wish I was a shark, and then I wouldn't have any worries about being eaten.'

A large mysterious cod appeared and said, 'Your wish is granted'

Lo and behold, Justin turned into a shark.

Horrified, Kristian immediately swam away, afraid of being eaten by his old mate.

Time passed (as it does) and Justin found life as a shark boring and lonely

All his old mates simply swam away whenever he came close to them.

Justin didn't realize that his new menacing appearance was the cause of his sad plight.

While swimming alone one day he saw the mysterious cod again and he thought perhaps the mysterious fish could change him back into a prawn..

He approached the cod and begged to be changed back, and, lo and behold, he found himself turned back into a prawn.

With tears of joy in his tiny little eyes Justin swam back to his friends and bought them all a cocktail.

(The punch line does not involve a prawn cocktail - it's much worse).

Looking around the gathering at the reef he realized he couldn't see his old pal.

'Where's Kristian?' he asked.

'He's at home, still distraught that his best friend changed sides to the enemy and became a shark', came the reply.

Eager to put things right again and end the mutual pain and torture, he set off to Kristian's abode.

As he opened the coral gate, memories came flooding back.

He banged on the door and shouted, 'It's me, Justin, your old friend, come out and see me again.'

Kristian replied, 'No way man, you'll eat me. You're now a shark, the enemy, and I'll not be tricked into being your dinner.'

Justin cried back 'No, I'm not. That was the old me. I've changed.'........

(You're going to love this...............................)







'I've found Cod. I'm a Prawn again Kristian'

[RBF]

Oh Cod thats bad!

[xdford]

An old couple walked into a pharmacy and asked to see the proprietor.

The old man said to him " we're moving to this area in a few weeks and just checking out that we can get all we need... do you have walking frames and sticks"

"Yes" said the pharmacist " we have a full range of frames and crutches etc for either sale or hire, whatever you need"

The old lady piped up "Have you got a full range of medications?"

"Yes" said the pharmacist " we have a full range of medicines here for just about any complaint"

"What about multivitamins?" she asked

"Yes" said the pharmacist " we have a full range of those too"

Then the old man sheepishly asked " Do you have Viagra here..."

By now the pharmacists patience was running a bit thin " Yes of course we do but can I sell you anything at all?

"Not today" they said " but we're getting married in a few weeks... would you mind running a bridal registry for us?"

[Homan]

Produce Manager at Publix

A man walked into the produce section of a Florida Publix supermarket and asked to buy a half head of lettuce.
The boy working in that department told him that they only sold whole heads of lettuce.
The man was insistent that the boy ask his manager about the matter.
Walking into the back room, the boy said to the manager, "Some a**@#$*e wants to buy a half head of lettuce."

As he finished his sentence, he turned to find the man standing right behind him, so he....added,
"And this gentleman kindly offered to buy the other half."
The manager approved the deal and the man went on his way.

Later the manager said to the boy, "I was impressed with the way you got yourself out of that situation earlier. We like people who think on their feet here. Where are you from, son?" "

Kentucky, sir." the boy replied.
"Well, why did you leave Kentucky?" the manager asked.

The boy said, "Sir, there's nothing but whores and basketball players up there."
"Really?" said the manager, "My wife is from Kentucky."
"No kidding?", replied the boy, "Who'd she play for?"

[Vicky56]

Wow. Two great saves in one day.